Ever since he had first seen her bathing in Agartha’s mystical pond of Rebirth, which glittered most gloriously he now knew, Fletcher Munsin’s sexual fantasies of himself being intimate with this so-called Lady Magdalena had been dominating his adolescent curiosity as he continued to unprovokingly obsess fanatically about her without knowing why. And although he wouldn’t at all understand the intense feelings he was now permanently experiencing day after day like a Kurse of Konfusion during his mostly lonely time in the otherwise deeply pleasurable and clean Inner Earth Underworld, the man would eventually come to discover far too late that he was truly in deep-love-since-first-sight with this ‘kreature from Below,’ as his new unicorn friends would start calling the Mother, after Fletcher Munsin had told them both about her.
The two cute, little white unicorns had warned Fletcher Munsin about the mysterious little Pond and its location, and how dangerous they thought it was — that particular impression being of course afterall the Word of the Woods. But Fletcher Munsin had wanted to See the Pond for himself. After first witnessing the heavenly twinkle glinting off the glare of its surface and how it shimmered, he thought he somehow understood why a human creature so stunningly gorgeous as the Lady Magdalena would be attracted to it. A human creature she was, supposedly. A human creature like he, himself was — supposedly.
The man was intrigued and mesmerized by the Pond. He bathed in its Waters periodically hoping the woman would return, not straightaway feeling anything particularly remarkable about it, but fascinated with it nonetheless. He began keeping most of his time within a Stone’s throw of it, and throw Stones into it he so did throughout the day.
One afternoon, after a month of creeping around sketchily in the area of forest surrounding the Pond, Fletcher Munsin caught sight of Mother Magdalena once again as he inadvertently bore witness to her instantaneously breaking through into the Underworld via a rift he saw suddenly rip open with a sparkle just beside the Pond, depositing Magdalena on the ground nearby it. That rift, when torn open somehow, must be the doorway to what Al Rodnam calls “Surface Urth!” marveled Fletcher Munsin. That other world must be Magdalena’s world. But was Magdalena truly human like Fletcher Munsin apparently was? Considering all he thought and felt about her without even yet meeting her in the flesh, the man was thinking that if he, himself, indeed was in fact human, then she most definitely was as well, although probably the member of a darker-skinned tribe from the one out of twelve the lightly-tan Fletcher Munsin was supposedly a descendent.
Wow, he thought. The man attempted to explain to himself the odd, bizarre feeling of surreal attraction he was experiencing, and failed. The woman had stolen his heart, and he blushed, then grinned, as he privately admitted to himself that he would do absolutely anything to please her. If it were in fact true that she and him were both human, and that humans hailed from Surface Earth, then the so-called Surface Earth is his birthright as much as that of his alleged world in the Sirius Sector! His Imagination spun wild. Did the mystic who manifested me into three-dimensional existence purposefully forgo informing me of this other crucial fact of my heritage in his sorry-ass excuse for an explanation of who I am and where I’m from? The curious man all of a sudden felt a sharp pain surge through his systems and deliver him sharp emotions of how so cold and alone he in fact was and would be in life, throughout all versions of himself, in every incarnation.
Fletcher Munsin wondered what it would take for him to be able to pass through to the other side of this portal, if it was indeed at all possible. And although he was not supposed to do so, he wanted badly to pass through it and see what it was really like there. His curiosity piqued and he imagined himself taking his Mother by the Hand and teleporting to Surface Earth — the Land that was really Below. How beautiful it must be there.
And so it was that Fletcher Munsin had convinced his two unicorn friends that if they did indeed wish to travel to Surface Earth — a place where they, too, had supposedly originated — they must come with him to the feared Pond, informing them that he had located the entryway there. Besides, he had told them, he was trying to find a way there himself. It took several days of convincing — for, the two twin unicorns were mighty cowardly — but the two, finding courage from Fletcher Munsin’s guidance and enthusiasm, made their way to the Pond with the man on a fine sunny day like most others in Agartha.
When the three supposed Earthlings drew in view of the most-curious shimmering wonder modestly wavering in the center of a stand of bold oaks, Sybil, one of the two little unicorns, abruptly came to a quivering standstill.
“What’s the matter?” asked Sybil’s twin, Salient, telepathically to his brother. “It’s the Pond. We’ve arrived. I know we’d made a promise never to come back, but we’ve seen it before, Sybil. Why the sudden apprehension?”
“I… I — don’t remember it being so colorful,” replied Salient, “Look, Sybil, the Waters — they’re churning slightly despite not having a source of disturbance. Something is different about this Pond this time. Something has… has changed about it.”
“Maybe we’re the source of disturbance,” joked Fletcher Munsin telepathically to his two friends, then laughed. “I’m only kidding. I doubt that the Pond’s Waters has any consciousness of its own.” He paused. “But I guess you guys would know the likelihood of that better than I would.”
“It… is possible,” said Sybil to Salient inquisitively.
Salient was frustrated at this statement, fearing his brother may be taking on a new approach from how the two of them both used to think about the Pond, all because of their strange new friend’s passionate obsession — their new human friend, who didn’t seem to know much of anything other than the English language, even though he couldn’t vocally speak it. “You really think so?” asked Salient from within his head to his brother.
“So what if it does?” said Sybil with a hint of annoyance, “Do you think the Pond is going to swallow you up whole and shit you out in some devil’s world? What’s the matter with you? We’re fine. We’re only here because our new mute friend here said he saw the portal to our beloved Underworld next to the Pond here with his own eyes. And, I thought we had finally resolved to see if we can pass through it! I know it’s scary. I’m scared, too, Salient. But we have to suck it up if we ever wish to get back to the world we’re from.”
“He’s right,” chimed in Fletcher Munsin telepathically with a determined look.
Salient remained silent, still shivering slightly.
“Oh, come on, Salient!” Sybil pressed to his brother. “Tell ya what. If we’re gonna figure out how to do this properly and effectively, however we’re able to do it, you need to rid yourself of your lingering worries,” stated Sybil, secretly feeling a bit worried himself. “It’s okay. This kreature from Below that Fletcher Munsin speaks of is nowhere to be Seen. Walk up to the edge of the Pond and take a sip. It will reassure you everything is okay! Go on! Fletcher Munsin and I will watch you here, from the brush.”
Salient glared at the Pond with determination but still felt really unsure of it. It was, afterall, shared amongst all the animals in the forest that drinking those Waters could be risking your health. But after a long moment’s hesitation, the brave little Salient reluctantly began making his way toward the Pond.
“There you go, brother!” offered Sybil with encouragement. “Trust me, my instincts tell me that the Pond’s Waters are not toxic in any way. After you take a sip of it, come back to us here in the brush and we’ll try to locate the whereabouts of this portal to our world somehow. Where exactly is it, friend?” asked Sybil to Fletcher Munsin.
“Just ahead beside the Pond here,” replied Fletcher Munsin. “It’s unmarked and can’t be seen until the Lady comes through it.”
Sybil was a bit confused but remained silent as he kept listening to the strange man.
“When Salient gets back I say we wait here until the Lady comes, try to befriend her, then ask her if we can go with her through the portal. I know it’s a sketchy plan, but that’s all I’ve been able to think of.”
The bold Salient was almost at the edge of the Pond now, his cautious steps becoming slower and slower as he approached it. When he was close enough to the Water to be able to take a sip, he looked back uncertainly at his companions.
“It’s okay!” Sybil shouted silently over to his brother. “You’re doin’ great, Salient! Let us know how it tastes!”
Salient arched his furry white neck over the side of the swirling Water and began slowly lowering it to take a sip but before his nose ever touched the surface, a rapid flash of a stick-like blur obstructed the figure of the poor unicorn as it inexplicably struck it, stunning it instantly to a fall, and he laid there at the edge of the pond, his limp body bleeding out from the arrow’s protrusion.
Sybil and Fletcher Munsin were instantly shocked to silence and disbelief as they watched from afar. After that most haunting moment, Sybil started to run over to his dead brother but Fletcher Munsin stopped him quickly with hushed, panicked words. “Sybil no! Wait here! Something’s moving up ahead!”
Both Sybil and Fletcher Munsin quickly crept behind the cover of a thick evergreen bush and looked out toward the fallen Salient as two long, thin legs black as midnight and glittering brilliantly strutted from behind a nearby tree up to his body, the great wooden longbow strapped to her back most evident. The woman was fully in view now, and the two stared on in amazement as they both instantaneously realized that Mother Magdalena had been there all along.
She carelessly snatched up Salient’s body and took a few cautious, angry steps away from the Pond, her mighty golden dress beaming rays of photons all about her. She adjusted her serpentine tiara, held still for a moment, then zapped away in a flutter of blinding stars and rainbows before the very eyes of Sybil and Fletcher Munsin, the two fully shocked out of their minds at the spectacle.
* * *
Magdalena was so determined to find an animal, so desperate to put Al Rodnam at ease and appease this mysterious “Solaria,” that she hadn’t planned too well the full execution of what had been requested of her from the old mystic regarding the need for animal protein in their tribe. She realized as much just after she ripped through the portal back to Surface Earth in a flash with the dead unicorn in hand and was immediately brought to a stunning halt by a high-voltage shock that hit her blockhead square in the face, knocking the dome-coiled Amrita from off her Head. This hadn’t hurt the majestically protected Mother, but her pet was squirming seemingly in agony on the ground before her. When the bright light subsided, a thin trail of vapor swirled around in its place, coming to slowly clear out about her to reveal an angry Al Rodnam just in front of her, a long rune-riddled hickory staff made from the incubating tree of his Immortal Earth held out in his grasp before his tiny frame at the Mother. And the stench of the post-apocalyptic air was most abhorrent.
Magdalena was speechless and embarrassed at Once as she came to the immediate cold, hard realization that the mystic had Known about the existence of her and Amrita’s secret Inner Earth Underworld all along, let alone the fact he had used his access to it in order to gain entry from the bottom of the rejuvenating Pond to his Immortal Earth and procure the Solaria Seed and four sticks that had now combined to become his mighty Staff of Lachrylon.
And he shook his staff at his Mother.
Before she could respond to the devious actions taken out by Al Rodnam, he threw out a throat-silencing spell to her vocal cords with a twist of his fingers, grabbed up the squirming Amrita from the ground, and ripped the unicorn carcass from Magdalena’s grasp.
“Thank you for this,” he stated calmly to the Mother, and started to turn around. “I knew I could count on you. But I am hereby stopping your access to the Underworld by imprisoning your pet for the time being. I’m sorry, Mother. But it must be this way,” said the mystic to Magdalena before turning back around slightly, a leather satchel that had been hanging off his shoulder now in his grasp. “I am going to go work on duplicating our food source,” he said, as the expired unicorn in his grasp, now fully ascending, and exposed to the toxic air of dead Surface Earth, started to morph into a horribly ugly Piggy that had inexplicably ripped out jagged little wings from out its shoulders. “Here, Mother,” he said earnestly. “I need you to think about what you’ve done.” And he raised the bulky satchel he was holding up to his Head and threw it at the face of the Mother, the binding twine that had secured its contents coming undone, a bunch of the gilded grunts’ detached penises hitting her squarely in the face, one of them coming to precariously bop her chin to the side with increased emphasis.
The Mother, a fierce look of hatred and resentment forming on her dirty dick-riddled face, attempted a response but found her vocal cords tied tightly shut. “I am taking the dead animal, your pet, and the grunts who have been gilded by you to my campsite for inquisition. Take your time, though…” Al Rodnam went on with pursed lips, “…getting acquainted with what the grunts had previously been endowed with.” The old man went on to expose his own penis and held it. “I still have mine, Mother, and I intend to continue using it.” He glanced coyly at the enraged Magdalena’s face before him and stated, before walking away hunched on his staff, “Fuck You, Mother.”
* * *
“I’m here, Lina!” came the ominous response from Amrita several hours later into Magdalena’s Head, “…at the old man’s campsite, inside some sort of glass box. You gotta release me! I’ll let you know when he goes to sleep. Then come for me, Lina!”
A couple of hours later, the Mother was beside the mystical glass cage that held Amrita prisoner. “I’m gonna find a way to save you!” she said telepathically to her pet. “And then, after that, we stop doing Solaria’s bidding and forge our own path forward!” she went on to state to her friend with conviction. “I am sick of this faraway, intangible god-force paving the road for us,” Lina shouted ostensibly with compulsion, before amending “Why has ‘Solaria’ decided what we must do with our world and people when I can’t even see this Solaria?!”
“That’s easy,” replied the snake with a hiss and squirm, “The answer to that is… you will come to see that I am Solaria.”
The Mother went white-faced and felt her throat tighten up again, this time doing so without the aid of the old man’s magick. But before the Mother could respond, the snake quickly added with an intoxicating laugh, “Just kidding!!!”
The Mother shot Amrita a cold stare. “Oh, very funny!” she managed with seriousness, “I forgot you have a sense of humor now as a snake. But honestly, I’m not amused!” Lina said boldly before adding, “I’ll find you a way out, Rita, and when I do, I’ll return.” She said it with assurance despite then turning away in disgust, her golden dress short-circuiting slightly in blinks as she tiptoed from Al Rodnam’s camp quietly, a flurry of frustration devouring her confidence. ♡ –MIKE EYE
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